10/6/06

I've got nothing today. Well, I have a wicked case of indigestion and heartburn, but I don’t have anything to say. Mom’s church does this thing every Halloween called “Trunk or Treat” where folks from the church dress up and hand out candy from, you guessed it, the trunks of their cars in the parking lot of the church. It’s sort of a way to allow the local rug-rats to do the traditional wandering around receiving candy thing in a supervised place. Mom wants me to bring the Seven to it this year. I said I would. I need to come up with a costume though. The pirate thing, which is the only “costume” I have on hand, doesn’t really fit with the car though. Perhaps I could “bloody up” one of those pairs of overalls, don my helmet, and be a “racing car crash victim” of some sort. I'll keep that on the back burner as a potential. If I was still running the Brookland screens I could make a fake bird imbedded into my forehead and go as a “bird strike” victim. Of course there’s always the big boobs, blonde wig, driving suit, and helmet: “Drag Racer.” I'd have to bounce that one off mom first though. Not sure where I'd find a sequined driving suit either. No one would get it, but I could dress up all sixties English spy like and be “Number Six” from the TV series “The Prisoner.” He drove a Seven you know. I have always wanted a Nehru jacket. Oh, if I could find a big white weather balloon to go with it… no one would get it then either. Well, maybe some of the adults, the geeks. It’s a good costume, but a bit too, is “esoteric” the word I want? I don’t know. We’ll see. I wish I had a Theremin to play while handing out the candy. Ok, I won’t talk about that today. I do want one though. I just had a “wild juxtaposition of images” idea for a costume. If I got some of those drywall stilts and some arm extensions of some sort, I could be like this really tall dude with a tiny car. The fake hands on long arms would be the tough part, I would think. Although if the fingers didn’t need to move, some mannequin arms would work. Of course I don’t have any mannequin arms either. And I don’t think I can play a Theremin with mannequin hands. Sorry, sorry. Had to throw that in. I had a thought for next year’s thing though. Remember how I mentioned wanting to paint Mr. Wiggly orange? Well, if Mr. Wiggly were orange I could stick on Jack O’ Lantern decals, temporarily of course, and have a Halloween-mobile! Then again, if I painted it like the Mystery Machine it would be cool year round! The problem there is coming up with three friends and a talking Great Dane to run around with you all the time. No, I think the Wig O’ Lantern is the way to go. I could even carry a sound system and a Theremin in the back! Know what? Y'all are just going to have to deal with my Theremin obsession for a while. Oh! I just had another idea! If Mr. Wiggly were left “Area 51 Motor Pool White,” I could dress up as an MIB and hand out candy while trying to keep prying eyes from seeing the dead “alien” in the back of the van. Dang, I wish I'd bought that dead alien back in ’97 when Pat, Nora, and I went to Roswell for the fiftieth anniversary of the UFO crash. I suppose there is a way to have both vehicles there and something “funny” for each one. If I towed the Seven there behind Mr. Wiggly, I could stand with Mr. Wiggly as the MIB while mom stayed with the Seven as if she drove it! That’s another one I'll have to bounce off her. Well, it’s approaching lunchtime. I think I'll shut this down for a bit. I may be back later. And I'm back. About halfway through the Italian Sausage sandwich at lunch, I remembered having terrible heartburn and indigestion. I thought, “Wow, this sandwich probably wasn’t the best choice today.” I was right. The heartburn and indigestion has abated none at all. Oh well, what are you going to do? I think I'm going to stop by a costume/magic shop sometime and see what ideas I can gather for this thing Halloween. I'm thinking that they’d be the place for the fake hands if I went for the juxtaposition gag. Or perhaps another idea will strike me while there. We shall see. Well, I just passed the page break, which is what I was looking for, so I think I'll call this week’s rants complete. I'll be taking off next Friday and the following Monday and Tuesday for the Lotus Owners gathering here in Fort Worth. I'm not sure why I'm telling you that so soon, but I did. Anyhoo, have a swell weekend. Theremin!