1/17/07

Dart/Valiant, toh-MAY-toh/toh-MAH-toh, whatever. Anyhoo, my headlights for Matilda arrived yesterday. They came in two huge-assed boxes. Mom called to tell me that I had two huge-assed boxes on the porch. Well, she didn’t say “huge-assed” of course, but I digress already. I told her what they probably were; the headlights, and she said something to the effect of, “No, they’re too huge-assed to be headlights.” Again, she didn’t really say huge-assed but you get the idea. I get home and sure enough, they do seem too huge-assed to be headlights. I open one of the boxes and sure enough they are the headlights but they are also huge-assed. I held one aloft, well I held it in front of me at least, and marveled at just how monumentally huge-assed it was. On the car they look half the size. I guess when you are comparing it to 2,000 pounds of car versus almost no pounds of free air they will gain some size. Perspective and relativity are interesting things, whatever that means. Anyhoo, I'm not sure how, or even if, we’re going to get them apart, painted, and back together again. I mean I know how the instructions say to get them apart, by “cooking” them in a 200-degree oven for thirty seconds, but those instructions were for a VW headlight assembly. VW headlights have little clips that hold the lenses on/together when Juan is finished. I'll just have to get these to John and see what he has to say about it. On another note, I'm trying really hard to send $125.00AU to Australia but no one seems to be able to do it. The Credit Onion can’t give me a money order in Australian dollars. The post office said they can’t send money to Australia for some reason. Now, I could have screwed up with my request there. I walked up and told the trained monkey, “I need to send one hundred twenty five Australian dollars to Australia.” Now that could, I suppose, be interpreted as, “I want to WIRE one hundred…” but what I meant was, “I need to send a money order for one hundred…” I can see how they might not have capacity to wire money to a third world country like Australia… wait a minute! Australia isn’t a third world country! No, I think they, the USPS, are just a bunch of idiots. Well, before I get too pissed off I need to shut down. I may be back later but don’t bet on it.