5/22/07

I forgot about an incident on the way home from the shop Saturday evening. I was driving Mr. Wiggly, and got stuck behind a couple riding on a Honda Valkyrie. At least it wasn’t a Hardly. They were in front of me on 377 and turned in front of me on 1171 headed north, or whatever direction that is. We were rolling along pretty well then he turns on his left blinker about ¼ mile before the Aledo/Iona road turn. “That’s cool,” I think, and continue to follow. He slows way down at the railroad tracks and I assume he is actually going to turn. They both look down Aledo/Iona and I slowly begin to edge by to their right. Well, he suddenly starts to go again so I hit the brakes and instinctively try to downshift. You cannot downshift a thirty-year-old three-on-the-tree quickly. It jams into second gear and nothing I do with the shifter will make it work. I swear and yell for a bit while they look back and ride off. I pull off to the side of the road and have a look under the hood. Fortunately I had investigated the shift mechanism before and knew what it was supposed to look like and how it worked. I grabbed the rod going from the mechanism to the transmission and yanked it out of gear. All of the stuff popped back where it was supposed to be and I was back in business. I headed home and then watched “Ladies of Ninja Warrior” for the rest of the evening. Ok, Sunday morning I get up and head for the office to reinstall that table box. Remember, the one from Friday afternoon? I’m driving along and get to about Blue Mound Road when I realize I forgot my badge. I'm not going back home for it though. I park in the visitor’s lot closest to the stairs and head down to the ROCC (Resource Operations and Communications Center or something like that). I give her my license and ask for a temporary badge. She comes back and says, “Tim, you have like fifty clearances. Do you need them all today?” I tell her to set me up to get in the AOB (Administrative Office Building) and I'll be fine. She hands me a badge and I'm off. I get to the room, hoping they have started somewhere else, to find the table already in place. “Damn,” I say to myself. I try to install the power cords but I can’t get the little safety slider things to move out of the way. I go find the Jefe of the group doing the install and ask if they can tilt the table for me to get the plugs installed. They do and I do. Another five minutes and I'm totally done. I head for the door. I return the access badge and head back to Mr. Wiggly. I decide to go on home before heading to the shop so I can change out of my sandals and into regular shoes. This I do. Next I head for the BoP for some supplies to work on George. I get a big fuse holder thingy, a big fuse for the holder thingy, some ring terminals, some zip-ties, a thing of rags, a Mountain Dew, and two really nasty Jack Link’s Meat Stick things. I'm sure I bought something else but I don’t remember what. I head back out to Mr. Wiggly and turn the key. CLICK, CLICK! The starter doesn’t turn. I notice it reads 13 volts but still nothing. I head inside to the service department. “Remember that van y'all put two alternators on within the last year?” I say to the guy. “Well, it won’t start.” He sends a monkey out with a jump box to see if we can fire it up. CLICK, CLICK! Nothing. We agree that it isn’t the battery and move on. I remove the doghouse and he taps on the starter while I try the key again. CLICK, CLICK! Nothing. He suggests I remove the starter and have them test it. I grab the socket set from the back of Mr. Wiggly and get to work. I get everything disconnected but need an end wrench to actually remove the starter. I have no end wrenches. As we’re going in to get one, I decide I might need a set in the future and go buy some. I get the starter off and take it in to be tested. It tests fine. The new monkey follows me out to the van to see what’s what. Now, when I call these guys monkeys, I don’t really mean it in a bad way. I'm just… well, I'm just being a dick I guess. Anyhoo, I reinstall the starter and we try it again. CLICK, CLICK! Nothing. I determine it must be the starter relay on the firewall and remove it while the monk… er guy goes back in to see if they stock it. They don’t. I take mine back out to try it again. I notice the cable from the battery to the relay A) doesn’t fit really well, and 2) is pretty rusty. I scrape it clean, or at least cleaner, and reinstall. I try the key and it makes that distinctive “Rrrrrrow rrrrrrow BAH-roooooom!” sound a hot-rodded Chrysler engine makes when starting. I button everything back up and thank the guy for his help then roll to the shop. I have more to tell about Sunday’s activities but I'm past my page break and the supermodel needs me. I'll finish tomorrow. Toodles.