7/18/08

It has come to my attention that they plan to roll out Windows Vista here at work this fall. I sure hope they hire more desktop support because, as I have said repeatedly in the past, Windows Vista sucks ass! Everyone is going to have to relearn Word, PowerPoint, Excel, and all the other programs they have come to depend on. Why? Because the stupid douche bags at Tiny and Flaccid decided that since all of those programs were working just fine the way they were, they needed to be totally changed. Then there’s the fact that the new versions save their information in a new format, which is totally incompatible with the old versions. Juan can’t just send someone something they saved in Tiny and Flaccid Office 2007 if the recipient doesn’t also have ’07. They won’t be able to open it. Juan will first have to save it as a Tiny and Flaccid Office Word ’97-2003 file and then send it. Programmers have to be the most asinine control freak shit heads on the planet. Line them up against the wall, every one of them. Well, not Bill Gates, he needs to be impaled on a long spike so he dies slowly. God damn, I hate computers. Ok no, I hate Tiny and Flaccid. Oh, and for the record, or for those of you with short attention spans, “Tiny and Flaccid” is Microsoft because Bill Gates named the company after his penis. I'm still not sure why I haven’t tried Apple. Probably because all of the TaF sycophants keep pushing the “Kool Aid” into my hand while continuing to fellate Bill Gates with money. Every time I relieve a laptop of its bondage of servitude to TaF, I threaten to go buy a Mac. “Oh, don’t believe the hype,” the sycophants say. I say it can’t be any worse than this crap. Kill ‘em all. Ok, I just looked at the calendar and noticed I only have two and a half months to get Shi-Chi back on the road before the BNSF Family Day Car Show. Yikes! I wonder how late I can leave it and still have enough time to make Mr. Wiggly presentable if Shi-Chi doesn’t come together as quickly as Juan hopes. I've been sitting here thinking about all of the projects sitting there waiting for me and it kind of beat me down. I really ought to ditch… Ok, I'm not going to go into that justification spiral again. I'll say I ought to ditch all but Shi-Chi. Then I'll say, “But I've had the Chickenhawk for so long…” Then I'll say, “And I only paid $5.00 for George.” Then I'll move on to, “I’ve tried, unsuccessfully, three times to sell Mr. Wiggly…” Then I'll justify Fifi and the trailer to haul Shi-Chi to events away from town. Then I'll figure out a way to justify Johnny. Then it’s a short leap to keeping Barbecue Bob and Herman and I'm right back where I started. Ok, so I am going to go into the justification spiral after all. Shut up, it’s my blog. Feh. Well, I got a reply from Too Intense Restorations about the flywheel bolts. They can still order them from Nissan Japan but they are $8.87 each. That comes to $53.22 for the six I'd need. I don’t know what to do. I guess since I'm gambling on Explodotron anyway, reusing the old bolts only puts one more bullet in the, um, spinny thing that holds the bullets in a revolver…. Ok, that analogy likening this project to playing Russian Roulette fell apart just then. Sorry. Where I was going with it was that I'm already taking measures to protect myself from Explodotron, the same measures will protect me from sheared flywheel bolts, Juan would assume. Oh, and there’s also the fact that something is going to kill me someday, it might as well be something I love. Well, Tiny and Flaccid has managed to piss me off again by not being able to… damn it. I just looked up the word TaF wouldn’t spell correctly for me. “Brussels sprout” does in fact contain the letter “S” four times even though most people I know don’t pronounce the last one in the first word. Fine, I'm still pissed off. I'm still going to call it a rant and go do something else. Perhaps I'll tell you why I wanted to spell Brussels sprout someday. Hint: it has to do with choking to death. Ooh, that’ll get ‘em thinking!