11/17/08

Well, I was a very good boy this weekend. I got paid on Friday and I didn’t blow a large sum on something stupid. I didn’t even spend a large sum on something, for lack of a better phrase, not-stupid. Let’s see, what happened? First off, my sales dude came and took me to lunch on Friday for my birthday. Oh yeah, the reason there wasn’t a rant Friday wasn’t because I skipped work due to (tee hee, I said doo-doo!) it being my birthday, apparently my eighth birthday. No, the reason there was no rant was because I stayed up way too late reading www.notalwaysright.com and could barely keep my eyes open at the desk. That, and the aforementioned sales dude taking me to a three hour lunch. I should have brought the guns with me and gone to the range after work for my free lane and target, but I didn’t. I went home and tried to “make room” for the upcoming sushi dinner I knew was coming at 1900 h. The bowel vacating operation was not as successful as hoped and I was not terribly hungry when it came time to meet for bait. I ordered about half my usual amount, which turned out to be just about the right amount for a normal dinner, and we sat and chatted. “We” would be Pat and Nora. John and Samantha didn’t make it although they were invited. As I was eating my Plate ‘O Bait, I got a discomforting rumbling in the belly. I was finished with the steak from lunch! I fought through it as long as I could, mainly because two dudes in a row headed to the bathroom, but finally had to release a hostage. I excused myself and went in to fly a quick bombing mission. Fortunately all went well and the pressure was released for the time being. I went back to the table and finished dinner. We talked some more but it turns out that flight was just a strafing run. The full “bomb load” was ready in the bomb bay and a new target was assigned. I held out for what I hoped was a socially acceptable amount of time after we paid and sat, then made “calling it a night” noises. We left and I hauled ass home. I made it just in time. Saturday morning I was supposed to meet Pat at his house at 0845 h so we could go to the gun show. John wanted to join us and return Fifi so we agreed he’d meet at my house at 0815 h or so. I rolled out of bed at 0750 h and went into the head and had a seat. I picked up a really dumb coffee table book I'd received as a kid and started reading it. I heard the phone ring and mom came pounding on the bathroom door. “John is outside waiting for you!” she yelled. “How much longer should I tell him it will be?” I yelled back, “Ten minutes!” and finished up the requisite paperwork. When I got out of the bathroom, I looked at a clock expecting to see 0815 h, 0820 h at the latest. No, it was 0845 h somehow. Oops. I quickly stuck in my eyes and shaved my teeth then got dressed. John was on the phone with Pat as I walked out the door. We headed to Pat’s in Darth Versa and picked him up. We were going to go to Old South Pancake House for breakfast but there was a line. We decided on Whataburger instead. John bought us Taquitos and drinks and we sat and ate. From there we headed to the gun show. I wasn’t surprised at the lack of parking, there never are any parking spots, bit I was surprised by the enormous crowd inside. It was ridiculous. We walked the thing and I heard a familiar noise. It was “Funeral March for a Marionette” or the theme to The Alfred Hitchcock TV show to most. I grabbed my phone and answered it since that is my ringtone for general calls. It was Larry Shuttlebus. No, I don’t remember his actual last name. He was just parking. A few aisles later, as we approached the main entrance, I called him. He answered and I thought I could hear him live as well as on the phone. Sure enough, he was on the next row. He joined me, John and Pat having moved on down the aisle, and we began to look at stuff. I was shopping for a lever action rifle in .45 Long Colt and found a few. Most were actually pump action though, come to think of it. I did pass up one used model with a scope for around $299.00 thinking I'd come back to look again if nothing else struck my fancy. I didn’t go back. After losing and catching John and Pat a few more times, Larry got caught up in a magazine and book vendor’s display. I bailed on him and kept up with my original gang. We walked the rest of the show and then headed out. As we turned the corner of the last aisle, John vanished. Didn’t say a word, just took off. Georged us, he did. Pat and I looked for him, and half-assedly for Larry, for a minute but I had to go pee. Pat said he'd wait by the door while I went out of the main hall. I peed and went back to the exit door and Pat came out shrugging. I sent John a text saying we were waiting by the ATM outside the exit and just as I hit send, he texted me saying he was outside. We found him and walked to the car. I called Larry to tell him we had bailed on him and said I'd see him Monday. I haven’t yet, but I plan to in a bit. We ate at Mexican Inn and then dropped John off someplace. I took Pat home and went home myself. I don’t think I did anything else the rest of the day. So you see, I can go to a gun show when I'm “nigga’ rich” and not buy something! And on that note, I think I'll save Sunday’s tale for tomorrow. Have a day.