4/28/10

Well, I'm stuck babysitting an all day “Safety Summit” or some such bullshit. Yeah, this ought to be fun. A whole bunch of union jerks flapping their gums about... whatever. Well, at least I'll get breakfast and lunch out of the deal. Oh, and I get to sit next to my “Beefy Girl” all day. BG is this kind of short, stocky girl I find strangely attractive. I don't think it is a case of “only clam in the snake pit” either because I've found her attractive for a while, even in the “real world” of the main campus where there is some real “talent.” She’s just plain cute. Ooh, she just did the “Thank yuh, thank yuh verruh much!” in the Elvis voice to me! I think I might be in lurve! Hmm, hopefully she won't read this over my shoulder. Yeah, that might be awkward. That doesn't look right but the spell checker took it. OK, so what can I gas on about today? I thought of another strike against the DCOE and header on Lil' Wiggly. That engine does have an oil leak and a billion miles on it. It might behoove me to consider the L-series. John pointed out that a five-speed conversion would be easier with an L-series as well. Well, not so much “easier” as in work wise, but “easier as in “we got one” wise. Damn, these jalapeño snausage pigs in a blanket things BG brought to the meeting ROCK! I've had two already and will probably have a few more once the meeting attendees have their fill. I guess my “diet” is going to hell today. I've already polished off one ‘Tard Fuel and have another hidden in the microphone case next to me. The donuts and pigs in blankets aren't helping either. Well, they are getting started. They need me to advance the slides for them from time to time so I'm going to have to pay attention to the speaker’s PowerPoint. Feh, that is going to suck. Wow, this guy is confusing me with the laser. He’s waving the remote around as if he’s trying to get the slide to advance, but he’s actually wiggling the laser on the screen. Hmm, I wonder what that little “A” at the top of the screen means. Looks like a typo. Great, the big boss of the meeting has his microphone on and is interjecting comments from time to time. I now have to watch him and make sure he’s ready to talk. Feh, this gig is really beginning to suck. I guess I will shut down and pay attention. OK, we’re taking a break. Of course I don't really have anything to say. I probably ought to go walk around for a bit. Yeah, I think I'll do that. Oh come on! God damned crybaby union fucks! I hate these douche bags. Their shit head workers are abusing the system and now they are crying about a “fix” that the company is proposing. Fucktard idiots. Fire them all and bring in non-union workers. Workers who would, oh I don't know, perhaps work? And how hard is it to pick up a fucking microphone you mumbling shit head fuck? These entitlement minded socialist are the ones who elected that sack of shit Muslim bastard in the White House right now. Not enough bullets on me right now. No, there are probably just exactly the right amount of bullets on me, none, because I really do not want to spend the rest of my life in jail for saving the world from these worthless shits. Bwahahahahahahahahahaha! This next group is talking about “Personal Responsibility In Decreasing Exposure,” PRIDE! Don't they know that the word “pride” has a huge gay connotation? These big burley manly men keep going on about their PRIDE program about safety and such but all I can think is “We’re here! We’re queer! Deal with it!” oh, there is even a little triangle in their logo! Hahahahahahahahahahahaha! Oh man, that makes up for the crybabies in the last presentation! Oh man, too much. Speaking of “too much,” we just finished lunch and I, as usual, ate too much. I'm miserable. Ugh. We have one more dude to speak, but he has two presentations and is planning to talk for the next two and a half hours. Hopefully these douche bags won't want to chat for the last two hours of the day. We'll see. Bleh, I don't even want to talk to y'all. I'm going to play solitaire. Sheesh, we, the BNSF people, just got thrown out of the meeting so the cry babies could discuss their union crap. I did shut down this so that one of their “spies” couldn't read what I had to say about them. OK, so we’re going again. THERE’S A FRIGGIN MICROPHONE RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU! PICK IT THE FUCK UP AND USE IT YOU DUMBASS FUCKING DOUCHE! Literally, there is a microphone laying on the table in front of that asshole. At least this new asshole speaking is talking loud enough to be heard. Ooh, these guys are really pissing me off. I am not the person to be baby sitting this meeting. I probably shouldn't be telling y'all all of this either. Then again, I'm not really giving any details about the meeting so it is probably moo. Of course they probably think I'm typing out a transcript of the whole thing. I wonder how I'd be able to prove I wasn't. I guess I can not. I probably ought to shut down and stop typing while they talk. In fact, I think I will do just that. I'll have more to say to y'all tomorrow.