10/17/2011

There is an internet clip of some black dude ranting about the government and the budget and stuff. He gets so mad at the end that he is inarticulate. Words fail him. That is how I feel when I start thinking about i-Shit. Friday’s rant, before the bacon calmed me down, was just getting going. Fortunately a hoon around Lake Worth “on the way” home that evening gave the car a reprieve. Saturday though… AAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHH! First off, Thursday I swung by the courthouse to renew the license on The Seven and the trailer. I didn’t have any paperwork on the trailer so they couldn’t do it. Ok, Friday I brought the title to the trailer with me and stopped at the courthouse again. This time they could renew the plates. Plates which were two years out of date I might add, but I won't because I haven’t been using that trailer… yeah, that’s it. Anyhoo, after the courthouse I was still early going home and hate it when mother points it out to me. So I went for a hoon around the lake. T’was quite nice. Saturday morning John met me at the house and drove Fiona to the shop while I drove Fifi. We were going to re-deck the trailer and finally install the aftermarket grille on Fiona. I also had a set of KDM Hyundai Genesis wheel center caps to install. First we went to Lowe’s for plywood. We bought that pressed board crap instead since this is a temporary fix and it was cheaper. Yes, by “temporary” I do mean I'll get around to replacing the deck in a few more years. Anyhoo, we loaded the wood into Fifi and went to take off again. I hooked the i-Pod to Fifi’s radio and fired it up. I was parked too close to Fiona and the Bluetooth connected. The motherfucking i-Pod shut the fuck off and would not fucking restart. I almost threw the fucking phone out the window into the back of the truck. If I had been sure John would have seen it, I would have. I curse your name, Steve Jobs! Rot the fuck in hell you fucking sack of shit bastard! At the shop, we had a look to see if there was in fact room to park John's B-210 when it came off the trailer and decided we did. We hooked up and dropped the car off then parked it. We re-parked the trailer and got to work on the decking. It was decided that we would not remove the old plywood and that we’d overlap the seams. We cut and laid the first and second sheets then cut to length and width the third sheet and placed it. John then screwed them down and we had a look. We both stood over one of the holes in the old deck, calculating that the two of us weigh about half as much as The Seven, and felt no movement. I was pretty confident that even if we balanced The Seven on one jack stand right on top of one of the holes it would not break through. We declared the trailer done and moved on to Fiona. John painted the grille while I got to work removing the old one. While we waited for the paint to dry, John drilled out the old wheel centers. We decided against jacking and removing the wheels because, “We’re never going to reuse these centers, right?” Yeah, that turned out to be a mistake. The new centers don’t fit. They are too small. We wrapped them in electrical tape and pookied them in with silicone. When John was happy with the paint on the grille, we installed it. It looks so much better! He convinced me that we needed to put the “Roadruns” emblem on after all so he did. Once we were “certain” that the silicone had had enough time to set on the wheel centers, we closed up and went to lunch. I followed in Fifi and noticed that the driver’s side center cap was about to fall off. I ran up and retrieved it from the wheel at the Hulen stop light. I'm sure the other drivers were wondering what the hell that was about. Oh, as soon as I pulled up behind Fiona in Fifi, the Bluetooth connected and shut off the fucking i-Pod again. I was goddamned mad at that, I will tell you. Fortunately there was a stop for gasoline between that incident and the wheel cap almost falling off. We decided on Hooter’s for lunch and John reinstalled the cap in the parking lot. We ate and hung out for a bit to let the silicone set again. They made it all the way home but the passenger side rear cap was falling off when mom and I went to lunch on Sunday. But I'll tell Sunday’s tale tomorrow.