4/2/14

Well, I may have to give up watching “Cougar Town” now that Courtney Cox has fucked up her face.  Last week, the first time she showed up all puffy and shiny-faced, I was prepared to give her the benefit of the doubt.  Maybe she had a cold and looked that way from being stuffed up… but no, she’s gone and had work done.  Badly.  Sure, it was just a matter of time, what with her working side by side with that other “Plastic Surgery Disaster” Crista Miller.  SHE was cute as a button on “The Drew Carey Show,” and when she first arrived on “Scrubs,” but then she started in with the Botox and nips and tucks on her face.  Now she looks like an old hag with a drum-skin plastic mask.  Then there’s the fact that she’s a total cunt.  I would like to attribute it to the scripts but she really started acting all cunty when her face was destroyed during her time on “Scrubs.”  As for Courtney Cox, she was aging well but now she looks like she’s having a bad reaction to a bee sting… and is all shiny and plastic looking.  It makes me want to puke every time there is a close up on her face.  Yeah, I'm afeared the “Cul De Sac Crew” is going to be dropped from my must see weekly viewing regimen.  It’s too bad, because it was a pretty funny show.  Oh well.  I suppose I could go all hipster and blame the crass product placement of Target stores in the show, but to be honest, that kind of thing doesn’t really bother me… not to mention I don’t remember why we’re supposed to hate Target anyway.  I think they’re owned by the French or something.  That doesn’t really matter either because I never shop at Target anyway.  Ok, so I've been away from the computer for a bit and now I'm back.  I'm through dissing the “Botox Twins” on “Cougar Town” and am ready to move on.  Such a shame, she really was aging well.  Anyhoo, I mentioned a V6 Nissan pickup the other day… or at least I meant to.  Whatever.  John has found a 1986-1990 (not sure on the actual year) Nissan D-21 “Hardbody” pickup with a V6 and five speed for $800.00 or so.  Thing is, one of the cams borked and took out the engine, hence the low price.  I'm thinking I need to buy it and build that mini “Suck Up Truck” to haul The Seven around.  I'm going to call it ‘Lectrolux… because “Hoover” or “Dyson” was not obscure enough.  We discussed swapping the V8 from Lil' Wiggly into it and putting the VG-30 in the B-210, but that is just dumb.  No, I need to tear into the VG motor and decide if it can be revived or if it needs a replacement.  Besides, the V6 will do what I need it to do well enough.  I imagine the stock bed will weigh more than the structure we’re going to build on there for hauling The Seven, and I'm sure the truck can handle 1,200 pounds on the rear axle, so it otter be fine.  Besides, there are always helper springs and air bags to help support the load.  For that matter, bagging the thing to lower the ass for loading the car ain’t the worst idea in the world.  Of course if we’re making the deck low enough that the truck’s rear tires poke through, lowering the ass to load would be counterproductive.  Hmm, I need to cipher and figger on that some more.  Here’s what I envision on the back of this thing:  of course the stock bed will be binned.  We’ll install a pair of “C” channel purlins lengthwise where The Seven's tires will ride… perhaps with a gap where the truck’s rear tires are to get them lower.  I'd want some sort of shield between the nose of The Seven and the cab of the truck in case the rear straps break in an collision, keeping the car from joining me in the cab.  Oh, and most important of all… zorst stacks with those rain flappers I bought for this project last year!  Oh yeah, we’re so doing that!  Dual zorst with a pair of Smithy’s glass packs standing up behind the cab.  Hells yeah!  Now we’re discussing, since it needs a motor anyway, going for a supercharged Nissan Frontier V6 for it!  What, WHAT?  If we can make the Ford distributor work in John's VG 510 wagon, we’re thinking of using that dizzy and a 55 DCOE on an adapter where the factory put the throttle body.  Oh shit, I'm getting a Major Woodrow Wilson thinking about this!  Of course now I'm also thinking about ditching the rest of the body and building the Rat Rod “Suck Up” we had in mind a while back.  I do still have the Oliver tractor nose.  Of course we’d revert to the name “Oliver Closehoff” then.  Man, I really hope the cab is majorly shitty now!  I'd be less inclined to bin it if it were in nice shape… which I'm afeared it is.  No, a nice cab with air-conditioning and all the other 1980’s luxuries is the right way to go… probably.  Ok, I've got to reel myself in and finish Lil' Wiggly before going off on this… aw, who am I kidding?  I'm long gone down this road.  I'd better just quit talking about it.  Have a day.