7/26/13

I was not as correct as I could have been the other day when I gave y'all the auction end time.  It turns out that it ended yesterday at 1330 h or so.  The final bid was $3250.00 and I don’t think it made reserve.  I'm still consoling myself with the fact that to replace Fifi it really needs to have A/C.  So, there’s THAT going on… or not as the case may be.  Ok, I'm just about convinced now that there is a ghost in my office.  From time to time I hear something rooting around in the cables hanging on the wall rack on the other side of my cubicle wall.  Ok, so THAT could be a critter.  I agree.  But this morning I heard distinct clapping coming from the hall or out over the ceiling of the Dance Floor.  I waited for the clapper to come through the door to my office… but no one did.  Ooooooooo-WEEEEE-oooooooooo!  Oh, then there’s the blood running down the walls, I almost forgot about that.  Ok, there’s no blood… but the creepy sounds happen!  Fortunately, having grown up in a haunted house, ghosts don’t send me scurrying like a Scooby Doo character yelling, “G-g-g-ghost!”  Hmm, maybe I otter become a ghost hunter!  Nah, that hardware they haul around looks expensive… and I have a tough time staying up late anymore.  Anyhoo, so I got a curious e-mail this morning: “Tim, I have a new home computer and need help hooking it up.  Would you consider driving to my home and helping?  Do you charge for your services?  Co-worker,” and then her “name and title and stuff” signature line thingy.  I'm about 99.5% sure it is what it seems and not the opening line to a “Boom-chicka-wow-wow” situation.  But I gotta wonder.  If a man had sent that to a woman, he’d be all up on harassment charges… no matter how innocent the situation actually was.  Hmm, perhaps this is my opportunity to get rich quick with a lawsuit!  I'm kidding of course, but there are ass-hats out there who would be all about the quick buck at the expense of a co-worker.  Of course if she IS propositioning me… damn, too risky.  I suppose I could fake computer literacy and go see what happens… and then I'd get sued for sexual misconduct when it turns out I don’t know how to hook up the computer and went to her place under false pretenses.  No, too risky.  I could confront her with the e-mail and see what she has to say.  Ok, “confront” was too strong a word.  I'm not sure what word works better but think more along the lines of “friendly and lighthearted ribbing” sort of thing… sort of thing.  As an aside, at this point I feel the need to ‘splain my constant use of the phrase “sort of thing.”  On the Britcom “Chef!” there was a character called Everton who was the nemesis/counterpoint/straight-man of the titular character.  Everton’s signature line, after making some explanation or whatever, was to say, “… sort of thing.”  Of course with his accent, it came out more like “Sor uv fing” with the “t” in “sort” swallowed as a guttural stop and… well, you know how “those people” talk.  Anyhoo, I've added that to my repertoire of idioms ever since… sort of thing.  Now, where was I?  Oh right, asking my sexual harasser, in jest, about the e-mail.  Thing is, I'm not going to play games.  If she wants me to come over for a shag, she needs to say so.  I'm not going to pussy-foot around with innuendo (in HER end-o!) and stuff.  I replied back that I'm just barely computer literate myself and would be almost useless in that role.  Ok, so I'm now bumping it up to 99.999% sure that it was innocent.  Her reply to me just now was, “I had to ask, because I'm no expert either!  Thank you and have a great Friday!”  I don’t see any way to read, “Well, come on over and boink me anyway,” into that.  Ka-pwinnnnng!  Bullet dodged!  Now I might go see her with the printout of the e-mail… now that I'm sure it will embarrass her with the innocent harassment rather than the snubbing of her advances.  And I may not.  We’ll see.  So, I'm not sure if we’re moving more stuff to the new shop or if John is moving house tomorrow.  I guess I need to find out.  I'll shoost him a text right quick.  Feh, I'm tired of talking to y'all now.  I think I'll go play solitaire and await his reply.  I might come back and tell y'all what we have planned if I get bored this afternoon.  Update: John wants to get some work done on his 610 so he can get it on the road and give Fifi back to me.  He also wants to go to D.A.T.S.U.N. and sweep up and see if we can do something with the old desk chairs and stuff left behind.  So, we may go to D.A.T.S.U.N. and we may not.  I'm to await his call on the matter.  So there.